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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30023049">The Biggest Oof</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alondere/pseuds/Alondere'>Alondere</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>From My Requests! [12]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Dentist Appointment, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Laughing Gas, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 22:56:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,836</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30023049</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alondere/pseuds/Alondere</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus got his wisdom teeth removed over the weekend, he comes into the common room high on laughing gas and painkillers.</p><p> </p><p>(Request, Remus gets his wisdom teeth removed and is dopey on laughing gas)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sirius Black/Remus Lupin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>From My Requests! [12]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1944721</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>85</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Biggest Oof</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Remus walked into the common room, through the portait hole, leaning heavily on Lily.</p><p> The bandages in his mouth hurt.  He told Lily so, too.</p><p> “Lily, can I take the painkillers again?”</p><p> Lily shook her head and ruffled his hair.  “No, you can’t have any more painkillers.  Not until four.”</p><p> Remus whined and groaned.  “It hurts!”</p><p> Lily brought Remus into the common room, they were attracting stares.  Lily saw Sirius on a couch and tried to walk the other way, but Remus saw him, too.</p><p> “Pads!”</p><p> Sirius turned around at the shout.  He saw Remus, his mouth bloody and obviously high out of his mind.</p><p> Remus stumbled to the couch and climbed into Sirius’ lap.  “Did ya miss me?”</p><p> Lily walked back around the side of the couch and held out the small bottle.  “His painkillers.  He had his wisdom teeth removed.  Those get him a bit high, too, but not terribly, like this.”</p><p> Sirius looked down at Remus, who was climbing over his lap to get comfortable.  He looked to the girl who was he was helping with her homework and back to Lily.</p><p> “Hannah, do you mind if we pick this up later?”</p><p> She nodded, staring at Remus.  He seemed to be staring back at her.</p><p> She got up, stretching.  “Yeah, thanks!  I understand this a lot better now, take care of your friend!”</p><p> He smiled at her and pet Remus’ head, almost correcting her before remembering they weren’t out, yet.  “Thanks, you’re really understanding!”</p><p> She walked away, back to her friend, who was glaring at them.  Sirius looked at her for a long moment before turning back to Remus.</p><p> “Hey.”</p><p> Remus beamed up at Sirius and said, “Hi!”</p><p> Sirius looked at Lily, who said, “Don’t leave him alone, make sure he doesn’t eat anything crunchy, <em>no</em> under any circumstances, candy.  He can have ice cream, or a milkshake, no chunks, I don’t want him accidentally chewing chocolate.  The painkillers are going to keep him a bit... eh dopey.  Don’t let him wander off, don’t let him do much on his own.  His judgement isn’t too affected, but he’s still very... happy.  Rinse his mouth, ice on his cheek will help swelling.”</p><p> Sirius nodded and looked down at Remus, who was staring at him with very happy eyes.  He crawled up and seated himself upright in Sirius’ lap.  “Have I ever told you I love you?”</p><p> Sirius smiled and patted Remus’ head.  “Many times, and then you showed me.”</p><p> Remus smiled, giggling.  “Did I?  Mm, I love you.”</p><p> “I love you, too.”</p><p> Remus seemed to be delirious with just giggles.  He didn’t seem to know where he was as he leaned down to kiss Sirius.  Sirius was surprised, but kissed him back, though without tongue.</p><p> Remus was suddenly torn off of Sirius, thrown to the ground.  He looked up and saw the Hannah’s friend, looking enraged.</p><p> She started screaming, “What the hell do you think you’re doing!?  Get the fuck off of him you scarred up freak!”</p><p> Hannah sat down next to Sirius and said, “I’m so sorry.”</p><p> Sirius glared at her and got out his wand, pointing it at her friend.  “What is she doing,” he asked as Hannah’s friend shouted at Remus.</p><p> “Ehh, I kinda didn’t need help with homework, I wanted to get closer to you, then Remus.  She thinks I like you.  She... dislikes Remus.  I’m sorry.”</p><p> Sirius closed his eyes.  “We’re gay.  For each other.  Fuck off.”</p><p> Hannah looked surprised as Sirius jumped up.</p><p> “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”</p><p> Lily stood up, too, drawing her wand.  Sirius pointed his own wand at her, but Lily nodded to Remus.</p><p> Sirius picked up Remus and made a point to kiss him first.</p><p> Remus’ leg twitched.</p><p> Sirius carried him up the stairs and to their dorm.  “So, how are you feeling?”</p><p> Remus closed his eyes, smiling.  “Happy, nice and floaty.”</p><p> Sirius kissed his nose.  “Hm.  Do you need anything?”</p><p> “Chocolate.”</p><p> Sirius bit his lip.  “How about chocolate ice cream?”</p><p> Remus nodded and looked excited, sitting up.  Sirius summoned some chocolate ice cream.</p><p> “Here.”</p><p> Remus opened it and Sirius summoned a spoon before he could eat it with his hands.  Remus took the spoon and started eating.</p><p> “Oh, Merlin,” he moaned, eyes slipping shut.</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes and kissed Remus’ cheek.  “Okay, I’ll leave you to it.”</p><p> Remus’ eyes flew open and he crawled over the bed, not minding the ice cream.  “Wh-where are you going?”</p><p> Sirius stopped and turned back around.  “To get your stuff.”</p><p> Remus whined and got up.  Sirius walked back to him and helped him up.</p><p> “Walk carefully.”</p><p> Remus nodded and leaned on Sirius, yawning.</p><p> He walked with Sirius, head on his shoulder, and immediately slipped on the stairs.</p><p> Sirius tried to hold back his laugh as Remus went tumbling down the stairs.  He ran forward and knelt down next to him.</p><p> “Are you okay?”</p><p> Remus nodded, saying, “Did it on purpose.”</p><p> Sirius laughed.  “Did you?”</p><p> Remus nodded again and yawned.  “Yes, it was faster.  See?”</p><p>  Sirius rolled his eyes and helped Remus up.  He kissed his cheek as he went back for the painkillers.  Remus followed him, looking like a lovesick puppy.  Hannah’s friend glared at him as Hannah looked miserable.</p><p> Sirius got the small bottle of pills and walked back to Remus.  Remus laid his head on his chest and mumbled, “I love you.”</p><p> “I love you, too.”</p><p> Remus smiled and let himself be led up the stairs, not realizing that he’d come out to a good portion of the common room.  Sirius laid him down in bed and crawled in with him.</p><p> “Do your teeth hurt?”</p><p> Remus put his hand up in a so-so gesture.  Sirius carefully pried his mouth open and looked at the bloody gauze in his mouth.  “Hm, okay.  How do I rinse your mouth?”</p><p> Remus shrugged.</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes and went to the door of the dorm.  “Lily!”</p><p> “What!?”</p><p> “How do I rinse his mouth?”</p><p> Remus sat up, head tilted to the side as Lily shouted back, “A cup of water and a tablespoon of salt, but start tomorrow!”</p><p> “Thanks!”</p><p> Sirius stepped back and looked at Remus, who tilted his head more.  He sighed and realised his cheeks looked a little swollen.</p><p> Sirius summoned two ice packs.  “Here, put these over your cheeks.”</p><p> Remus took one and did so, Sirius pressed the other one to his other cheek.  Remus pouted.</p><p> “We haven’t <em>really</em> kissed.”</p><p> Sirius kissed his nose.  “We can’t.  Your mouth is filled with blood.”</p><p> Remus looked pouty as he said, “You should be a vampire.”</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes as James and Peter came in.  “Hey, why did Evans just give us instructions to take care of Remus’... oh.”</p><p> Sirius looked around.  “He’s, er, a little... indisposed.”</p><p> James rolled his eyes and looked around Sirius at Remus.  “Hey, Moony.  How are you?”</p><p> Remus pouted more.  “I haven’t had a real kiss.”</p><p> James looked at Sirius, who sighed.  “Moony—”</p><p> “It’s not fair.”</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes and kissed Remus’ forehead.  “That’s what I can give you.  Your mouth is full of blood.”</p><p> “‘T’s nice blood.  It tastes good, I swear.”</p><p> Sirius gave Remus another kiss and yawned.  “How about we go to sleep?”</p><p> Remus started to nod, before he grabbed his cheek.  “Ow!  Ow, my mouth hurts!</p><p> Peter and James stepped back as Sirius got up and looked around.</p><p> Sirius opened the pill bottle.  He summoned some water and poured out two pills as Remus moaned, “It hurts!   Why does it hurt so bad?”</p><p> Sirius put the pills in his open mouth and had him sit up.  “Here, drink.”</p><p> Remus drank his water, staring at Sirius resentfully.  Sirius buried his face in his neck, licking it a little.</p><p> Remus smiled and Sirius kissed his neck before pulling away.  “I’m tired, aren’t you?”</p><p> Remus nodded and slipped beneath his blankets.  Sirius got in with him as James and Peter watched.  “There.  Sleep.”</p><p> Remus smiled and mumbled, “Sleeping.”</p><p> Sirius kissed his nose before Remus jumped up.</p><p> “I want crisps.”</p><p> Sirius sat up.  “You can’t have crips, Moony!”</p><p> Remus climbed out of bed and started towards the door and Sirius got out, too.</p><p> “Moony, you can’t have crisps.”</p><p> Remus opened the door and crossed his arms.  “Why not?”</p><p> “Because you have two big holes in your mouth!  You can’t eat crunchy foods!”</p><p> Remus waved his hand and Sirius was forced onto the farthest bed from the door as he left the room.  Sirius jumped up and ran after him, but Remus ran, too.</p><p> He didn’t fall down the stairs this time as he left the room.  He opened the portrait hole.  Sirius groaned as Remus left, heading for the kitchens, and ran after him.</p><p> Remus had a bit of a head start, but Sirius was fast and knew all the same secret passages as him.</p><p> Not to mention, Remus stopped, giggling and sitting against the wall.  Sirius caught up to him as he tried to get up again, but he was laughing too hard.</p><p> “H-hey,” he gasped.</p><p> He dissolved into giggles again, so Sirius picked him up.  “Come on, you need to go to sleep.”</p><p> Remus giggled against his shoulder and closed his eyes.  “Ion wanna.”</p><p> “I’m sure you don’t.”</p><p> Remus kissed his shoulder and squirmed down.  “I want food.”</p><p> “No crisps,” Sirius told him.</p><p> “Food.”</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes and started walking to the kitchen.  “How about some coffee?”</p><p> Remus wrinkled his nose.  “Meat.  Steak.”</p><p> “Steak soup.”</p><p> Remus shrugged.  “Potato soup.”</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes and set Remus down.  “You’re like a toddler when you’re not sober.”</p><p> Remus giggled and laid his head on his shoulder.  “You’re bluntly honest when you’re not sober.  Like super bluntly honest.”</p><p> Sirius scoffed, “Better than you.”</p><p> Remus sighed and kissed his shoulder.  “I love you.”</p><p> “I love you, too.”</p><p> Remus closed his eyes and let Sirius lead him to the kitchens, where he asked for potato soup.</p><p> Sirius took the bowl and thanked the house-elves, before sitting in the corridor by the kitchens and started to feed Remus the soup.  A few minutes passed in silence where Remus made little sounds with every bite.</p><p> “Okay.  After this, we go to sleep.”</p><p> “Sleep, after this.”</p><p> Sirius nodded and Remus yawned.  Sirius fed him another spoonful and Remus laid his head on his arm.  “I love you, you always take care of me.”</p><p> Sirius smiled and pet his hair.  “I love you, too, I love taking care of you.”</p><p> Remus looked up at him.  “Only me, right?”</p><p> Sirius nodded, kissing his nose.</p><p> “So if you take care of someone else, I can call it infidelity?”</p><p> Sirius rolled his eyes and gave Remus another kiss.  “Sure, why not?”</p><p> Remus closed his eyes and opened his mouth again.  Sirius looked down at the bowl and saw that it was empty.</p><p> “Okay, we’re done here, let’s go to sleep.”</p><p> Remus held his arms up and Sirius obliged, picking him up.  Remus kissed his cheek and closed his eyes.</p><p> “I love you,” he mumbled.</p><p> “I love you, too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am so sorry if this came out bad!  I tried, I would understand if you want a rewrite! (I hope you like the title, though)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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